Bingo at Three - April 2003
A short film comedy, 12-15 minutes.

This is possibly the stoopidest thing I've ever written. Which, when you consider what it's up against, is quite a statement.

I wrote 'Bingo at Three' for an American short screenplay competition, hence it appears here in American English. Or at least my approximation of it. Basically I just changed 'centre' to 'center', 'Mum' to 'Mom', and spent a few days trying to think in a Noo Yawk accent. I don't think it worked.
   Phil Gardner 2002/3.
Eat my shorts!
Keep On Keeping On - August 2002
A ten minute comedy short.

In the summer of 2002 I met a girl for a date. The outcome of which was that I decided I ought to spend more time writing and less time dating. 'Keep On Keeping On' was the result.

The title was something said to me a year earlier by my internet buddy Tundsy who, when responding to a post I'd written for the Funbets newsgroup, told me to keep on keeping on. It was the first time I'd ever heard that phrase. But more importantly, it came at a time when I wasn't feeling much like keeping on in life. So those words meant a lot to me. Something Tundsy is blissfully unaware of. To be honest, he was probably stoned at the time and didn't know what he was saying.
Take-One Productions, an American film company, said of 'Keep On Keeping On', "I laughed on this one. Nun jokes are a scream!"
They subsequently changed their minds however, and decided not to produce it, so I suspect the comment was the result of a dodgy bit of dictation, and should've read "None of the jokes are a scream."
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