You know you’ve had a good weekend when you end up locked in the police cells with a Conservative councillor. And may I say I’ve had a good weekend. Unfortunately it’s not quite as scandalous as it sounds. I actually spent Saturday morning roaming the basement (and sub-basement) of Brighton Town Hall, which is home to the Old Police Cells Museum, a free visitor attraction which is only open for two hours a week. Until the end of September. Then it's closed for seven months. So make the most of it while you can.

My guide for this underground operation was none other than Pat Drake, former Mayor of Brighton & Hove, and current Conservative councillor for Withdean. The museum was the brainchild of her late husband, and as Mayor she adopted the project, enlisted the help of Prince’s Trust volunteers to clear the sixteen skiploads of rubbish which filled the Town Hall basement, and eventually opened the cell doors to the public in 2005.

Unfortunately, despite being located at the Town Hall, started by the Mayor, and dedicated to local policing, the museum receives no funding from the council and can't afford to hire any full-time staff, so you can only go down there when Pat's got a couple of hours free to show you around. It's a real shame, because it's actually very good and well worth a visit.

Among the displays are historical helmets, handcuffs, uniforms and more truncheons than you can shake a large wooden stick at. There’s even an early fingerprinting kit complete with slides and dusting powder. But perhaps the most fascinating aspect of the tour is the fifty-year-old graffiti in the men's cells, which were used to hold prisoners right up until the late 60s. The walls feature amusing autographs from the law-breaking likes of 'Dave the Rocker, 8th June 1964', 'Beatnik George', 'Mick' (who "loves Sandra"), plus rude comments about the police, and artistic representations of various topless women in suspenders.

Other, more official, exhibits include a detailed model of the Grand Hotel just after the Brighton bombing of 1984, which has toured the world's police conferences as a reminder of what can happen if you let members of the public near politicians. Oh, and there's also a ghost.

Apparently the cells are haunted by the ghost of Chief Constable Henry Solomon. They should train him to do the tours, then they could open during the week. Solomon was murdered there in 1844 by a man named John Lawrence, who had stolen a roll of carpet from a shop in St James's Street and therefore thought it worth cleaving the chief constable's head open with a poker when no one was looking. We were shown the fireplace where it happened, but I didn't see any ghostly apparitions. Possibly because I don't believe in them.

As for John Lawrence, he was hanged three weeks later, so the wheels of justice were obviously a lot better oiled in those days.

Murder scenes are all very well, but personally I was more shocked to see that whilst the men's cells had cold concrete floors and no natural light, the female prisoners were treated to nice wooden flooring and windows. They obviously had a soft cell approach to women.

All in all it was a very entertaining experience. My only complaint is that due to lack of funding, your visit is limited to the time it takes to give the tour, meaning that having been whisked in and out of the cells for an hour whilst trying (and failing) to see everything on display, and listen to Pat Drake’s excellent commentary, you're then ushered out of the door before you've had a chance to take any amusing photos of yourself being locked up. I could have happily spent another hour there. Which is not something I ever thought I’d say about a prison cell.



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Published by The Argus on 17th September 2007

Hard Cell
   
by Phil Gardner
©
   Phil Gardner 2007