Hap-pea and Sweet Pea sat on the jetty at Captain Hop-pea's boatyard. The Captain was busy telling them all about his adventures. "When I was a young sailor," he said, "we used to have races out to those bulrushes and back. And I'd win every time!"

"What bulrushes?" asked Hap-pea, looking out across Poddle Pond.

"Why, those bul-" Captain Hop-pea began; but he stopped suddenly. The bulrushes were gone! "Well shiver me timbers!" he cried, "They were there yesterday. The gardener must have cleared them all away!"

For the first time the Peas could see the other side of Poddle Pond.

"I can see something." said Sweet Pea.

"Yes!" added Hap-pea, excitedly. "There are some houses. It must be another town of peas!"

Captain Hop-pea picked up his telescope for a closer look. "If it is another town, it's certainly not like Poddington." he said, as he peered across the pond. The sight which met his eyes was not a pleasant one. There were none of the well kept gardens and brightly painted flowerpot houses of Poddington. This place was muddy and untidy. Scattered here and there, Captain Hop-pea could see an old rusty kettle, an upturned bucket, some tin cans and a saucepan, which seemed to be the homes of whoever lived there.

Hap-pea and Sweet Pea were still staring across at this strange place. "There's a big sign over there." said Sweet Pea suddenly. "What does it say, Captain Hop-pea?"

The Captain looked through his telescope again. "It says... 'THE... B-U-G-Z. The Bugz!" he cried. "So that's who these houses belong to - insects!"

The two young peas looked at him in surprise. "The Bugzzzz!" cried Hap-pea, beginning to sound like one himself.

"Do you think they're friendly, Captain Hop-pea?" asked Sweet Pea.

"I don't know," he replied, "but I think we'd better go and tell the others." So the three peas hurried off down the lane as quickly as they could.

    The Peas weren't the only ones to have noticed that the bulrushes were missing. Over on the other side of Poddle Pond, two eyes were peering out from an old hollow tree trunk covered in cobwebs. The eyes belonged to Spike Spider, and the tree trunk was his home. "Well, well, well," he muttered to himself, "there's a town on the other side of the pond. I'd better go and tell Boss Bug right away!" He climbed down a cobweb and hurried across the mud to the old kettle, the home of Boss Bug, leader of all the Bugz. The kettle stood in the middle of a muddy puddle, with a drawbridge leading up to the front door. Spike scampered across, and pushed the door open.

"What do you want?" demanded Boss Bug.

Spike told him what he'd seen, and Boss Bug quickly grabbed a pair of binoculars and looked out across Poddle Pond. "I see what you mean." he said. "Quickly, go and fetch the others!"

Spike Spider turned and scurried out, and it wasn't long before all the Bugz were making their way towards the old rusty kettle.

The first to arrive was Sly Fly. Just as Zip-pea was the fastest pea, so Sly was the quickest of all the Bugz. He'd always wanted to be a super-hero, and flew everywhere at double speed, wearing a big 'S' for 'Super-hero' on his chest.

Sly was followed by Legs Centipede. Legs could never make decisions for himself, so he carried a small coin which he constantly flipped into the air to help him decide what to do. He climbed down the ladder outside his house, and made his way to Boss Bug's kettle, flipping his coin all the time to decide which way to go. "Heads I go right, tails I go left." he kept saying to himself as he walked along. As a result, he ended up going around in circles before finally arriving at the old kettle.

Soon after Legs Centipede came Lady Litterbug. All the Bugz were untidy, but she was the worst of all. She didn't want to leave her home too tidy, so before she left, she had to make sure it was in an awful mess - just the way she liked it.

The last of the Bugz to arrive was Bumbling Bee. He lived in the old saucepan, and he would run out of his door and along the handle of the pan, using it as a runway, before launching himself into the air. Unfortunately he was so clumsy that he tripped and fell head over heels into a puddle. Things like that were always happening to Bumbling Bee, so now he wore a crash helmet at all times.

By the time Bumbling Bee came crashing through the door of Boss Bug's kettle, all the other Bugz had arrived and were waiting eagerly to hear why Boss Bug had called for them.

Boss Bug pointed out of the window towards Poddington. "Look there." he said, with a mean smile on his face. "I've decided that would be a much better place for us to live. I'm going to have that castle at the top of the rockery, then everyone will know I'm the boss!"

"But what about the people living there?" asked Bumbling Bee.

"We'll take them over." replied Boss Bug. "It shouldn't be too difficult. I have a plan!"

All the Bugz groaned. Boss Bug's plans never quite turned out the way he intended. "Any objections?!" he shouted, glaring at the other Bugz.

"No Boss!" they all said quickly.

"Good." said Boss Bug. "Then prepare the Buggy for launching!"

    By this time, all the Peas had heard about the Bugz and had gathered together on the banks of Poddle Pond to decide what to do. The only peas not there were Sleep-pea and Dough-pea. Sleep-pea could sleep through anything and was tucked up in bed, fast asleep, whilst Dough-pea was too busy in his bakery, making all sorts of nice things - jellies, custard pies and blancmanges. Captain Hop-pea was looking through his telescope. "I can see the Bugz," he said, "and I think they've seen us too. They seem to be plotting something."

Captain Hop-pea was right. Boss Bug was busy preparing to launch the Buggy - his very own flying machine. He climbed in, carrying a big sack, and Sly Fly and Bumbling Bee sat either side of him on the wings. Unlike Boss Bug, they could fly, and it was their job to fly Boss Bug around in his Buggy. Boss Bug hated not being able to fly, but he enjoyed giving orders to Sly Fly and Bumbling Bee.

"Let's go!" cried Boss Bug, and with a few flaps of their wings, Sly Fly and Bumbling Bee soon had the Buggy airborne.

    On the other side of the pond, the Peas were waiting and watching, wondering what was going to happen, as the Buggy approached them high up in the sky.

"Look!" shouted Hap-pea suddenly, "Up there! It's the Bugz!" As the Buggy reached the bank, it swooped down over the Peas. Boss Bug took a paper bag out of his big sack and as he flew overhead he dropped the bag over the side of the Buggy. It landed on Grump-pea's head, and with a big SPLAT, burst open. It was filled with wet sticky mud, and it went all over poor Grump-pea, much to his annoyance.

"Why did it have to land on me?" he grumbled.

Creep-pea and Black-Eyed Pea, who were standing nearby, saw Grump-pea and couldn't help laughing at the mess he was in, until, with another big SPLAT, two bags of mud landed right on top of them. That made Grump-pea feel much better!

Soon the bags of mud were dropping all over Poddington, and the Peas began to run for cover.

"We must do something quickly!" said P.C. Pod, sheltering in the bushes.

"I think I have an idea!" said Scrap-pea suddenly. "Zip-pea, go as fast as you can to my scrap yard and bring back my box of rubber bands."

Zip-pea sped off and it wasn't long before he was back with the rubber bands. Scrap-pea then broke off a twig from the bushes, fitted a rubber band to it, and held it up for the other Peas to see.

"A catapult!" cried P.C. Pod, "Quickly, let's make more of them!"

It wasn't long before all the Peas had a catapult each. "Now all we need is some ammunition." said Scrap-pea. Just as he said those words, Dough-pea came out of the bakery, pulling a big cart loaded with trifles, jellies, custard pies and blancmanges - Dump-pea's weekly food order.

"That's it!" cried P.C. Pod. All the Peas rushed over to Dough-pea's cart and before long all the food was being catapulted into the air, with the exception of a few jellies, which found their way into Dump-pea's mouth.

SPLAT! A trifle hit Sly Fly. SPLOSH! A blancmange landed on Bumbling Bee's head. SPLAT! A custard pie hit Boss Bug right in the face!

"Turn around!" shouted Boss Bug, wiping custard from his face. "Get me back home, quick!" The Buggy turned and flew back across Poddle Pond, Sly Fly and Bumbling Bee doing their best to keep going, despite being covered in trifle and blancmange.

"Hooray!" shouted all the Peas together, as they watched the Bugz go. The Buggy landed on the other side of the pond, skidded across the mud, and ended up in a muddy puddle. It toppled over, throwing Boss Bug into the muddy water.

"They won't be back in a hurry!" said P.C. Pod, happily.

"That will teach them to TRIFLE with us!" said Hap-pea, and all the Peas laughed.

May 1992

The Poddington Peas Meet The Bugz
   
by Phil Gardner, from an original story by Colin Wyatt
©
   Phil Gardner 2002/3.